Blogging has been on my to do list for about a month now.
So much has happened since that last post that was full of heartbreak, yet full of joy.
As soon as my plane landed, I went to bed because I had to work at 7 a.m. the next morning. And it had been non-stop from there. That weekend, I had to pack up my life and put it in storage, because my roommates and I had not found a place, all while I had a fever.
And for a month and a half, through God’s grace and the grace of my sweet sisters in Christ, I lived in the beautiful area of the Heights with my friends Christeen and Lori. Two women who made themselves feel uncomfortable, for the sake of ensuring that I had a roof over my head. It was hospitality I will never be able to repay, though I will try.
It showed me such a sweet illustration of how Christ continuously gives without any regard of expecting us to return the favor.
The point of this blog was (and still is) to show my life and point to Christ in the process. To show my love for Him.
Let me be completely transparent and tell you that I have been doing a bad job of showing Christ. In this blog, in my circles, in general. Writing in my journal has been hard and so has writing on this blog.
Since that last post, my once fruitful walk, started to go through its winter season. And my walk felt dry and barren. And though I was in a safe space, physically, spiritually, it was dark. If this was the Lord testing me, I utterly failed.
Thanksgiving passed through. And so did the crazy season of Christmas.
The weekend before Christmas, on the 21st of December, my roommates and I found out that our application for a house was accepted. We met with the realtor that represented our now landlords and he said something that was so sweet and profound.
“We know you’re young. You are young professionals. We know the situation you’re in. So we will give you a chance.” Grace. Even though our application was rejected by many owners, they gave us a chance.
Later on that week, after much prayer, my parents and I went to look for a car. And I ended up buying a new one. Mercy. It was just the car I was looking for in the right price range. The salesman was so kind and understanding. He was not crooked at all. For my first car buying experience, it was smooth.
The Lord continued to provide, even though I would not choose to spend time with him. Our relationship is not works based at all. If it were, I don’t even really want to know what life would be like. And though I love Him, I continued to live life in sin and chose everything before Him.
The holidays were full of love and joy. The family that I was born into and the family that I have helped cultivate merged into one and it was a glorious experience. Then it was time to move to our new place.
Then it was the new year.
With new perspectives.
With new goals.
And I realized, I needed to get my life together. Spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally. Just all the possible “-ally”s.
This year, I want to…
- Dig deep into His Word.
- Fall deeper in love with Him.
- See myself the way Christ sees me.
- Move the body Christ made me.
- Respect the body Christ made me.
- Love the way He wired me.
- Challenge my brain
- See the world
- Save money
And I want it all to point to Christ. That someone, as sinful as I am, can still be loved and given redemptive grace.
Sometimes, I get so anxious about the future, that I forget to live the present. And then, I read this in my sweet little devotional today.
“In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comfort delights my soul. When my heart is overwhelmed; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. O Lord, I am oppressed; undertake for me! Cast your burden on the Lord and He shall sustain you.” (Psalm 94:19, Psalm 61:2, Isaiah 38:14, Psalm 55:22).
This year, will be about scaling back.
This year, will be about being intentional in everything I do.
I cannot wait for the year to unfold. Not only do I have my Savior rooting me on, the lovely ladies I live with, are as well. And as a household, I cannot wait to see adventures unfold as we share the same dreams for our home.
Bring it 2015.